March

Oh hello!  Sorry I haven't blogged in so long!  Here's my attempt to catch everyone up:)

We're still waiting to have our home study:/  We have everything turned in that we need but our social worker has been very busy with some urgent/intense situations so we've had to wait.  Of course we understand and are more than willing to wait but man is it hard to be patient sometimes!  I was hoping to have our profiles ready to show birth mothers by the end of March but it's unlikely that's going to happen now.  We also need to apply to a lot of grants and can't do that until the home study is complete.  So right now we're just waiting.....and trying to wait patiently.  Adoption seems to require a lot of that. 

Is it weird to feel like I'm already in nesting mode?  I know we probably still have a while to wait.  We haven't even been matched yet.  But I can't help it!  My house has to be ready now.  The baby room has to be ready now.  We have to have the names picked out now.   Everything needs to be clean and organized and perfect.  If you know me well you know I NEVER feel the need to have anything clean or organized!!  I'm the messiest person I know (my mom use to have to pay my friends to clean my room) but now I can't stand it.  I want it perfect for a baby.  I keep telling myself it's because we won't have a full 9 months to prepare ourselves.  Who knows how long our birth mother will be a long when we are matched up.  I don't want to be stressed and crazy about getting the house ready.  I'm sure I'll be anxious enough already!  Tyler thinks I'm a little insane when I nag him to build our built in storage unit or carpet the bedrooms.  I mean his logic makes since, we don't have the extra money!  But still, it's driving me completely crazy to not have the house how I want it!  Again I'm working on the patience....

On a completely different note, I'm running a half-marathon this Sunday.  Gah!!  I'm sort of freaking out about it.  I really don't work well under pressure.  I'm mostly excited and really pretty confident that I'll be able to do it but I keep obsessing over all the other variables that could go wrong.  I've had nightmares about sleeping in and missing the race or forgetting my shoes or my music not working.  I've become a little obsessive compulsive about making my packing list and packing my bag.  This usually isn't how I operate.  Which is why usually I forget something very important!  One time I forget my dress to the wedding we were traveling for.  I have forgotten underwear multiple times and have had to make an emergency trip to Target.  I'm always surprised when I actually do remember to bring my toothbrush.  Usually I end up sharing Tyler's (sorry if you think that's gross:)  But not this time!  I have packed and checked my list a thousand times and will continue to do so until we get on the road.  My race is in St. Pete but we're staying with my brother and sister in law in Bradenton.  Very excited to spend some time with family (my mom's coming in town too) and to run the race with my little brother!  I plan on beating him and having bragging rights for the rest of our lives.  A little sibling rivalry is always a good thing:)

Please join us in praying!  I have been thinking about our birth mother A LOT lately!  I have 2 friends in my bible study who are pregnant and due in September.  We've always sort of aimed for the baby to come sometime in the fall.  So now I keep wondering if she's already pregnant!  She's in my thoughts and prayers constantly.  Is she okay?  Is she terrified?  Is she safe?  Is the baby safe?  Constantly praying for God to protect her and the baby and to give her peace and guidance.  Please lift her up in prayers too!  And our child!

And if you think about it, please say a prayer for me while I'm running on Sunday:)  It's only through God's strength that I'll be able to do it! 

Thanks everyone!  I promise I'll try to blog again sooner next time:)  

quick update

See I told you I'm a bad blogger....:)

I just wanted to send a quick adoption update.  We had a bunch of verifications to get together before we could have our home study:
-copies of birth certificates
-copy of marriage license
-Health report from MD saying we're healthy enough to adopt
-copy of most recent tax return and estimate of current assets, liabilities, and monthly expenses and income
-letter from employers stating position, salary and status of employment
-DCF clearance
-Florida Department of Law Enforcement Screening
-Local Sheriff's report
(yes that's 3 different kind of background checks) 
-and at least 3 non-family personal references (but you can send as many as you want). 
               This was kinda a weird thing to ask for...."Hey can you please write a letter about how awesome Tyler and I are?  And please put in how we'd be great parents and please list all our best qualities.  Thanks"  I don't even take compliments well so this was just weird to ask for but I am soooo thankful for all the friends in our lives who have wanted to be a part of this process so sent in a letter for us.  It really means a lot to have such a strong group of support around us!  It takes a village to bring a baby home!

Well we finally have everything together!  All our references should be in by early next week and then we get to schedule our home study.  I'm really excited/nervous for this part!  I'm excited to get it done so we can start applying to every adoption grant we can get our hands on but I'm also just a little nervous about the process.  I honestly don't know all the details of what it entails so that makes it even scarier.  What helps is that we really like our social worker and I know she's here to only help us and already feels that our home would be a good one for a baby. 

I also want to share how God's been putting some really awesome people in our lives who have been touched by adoption.  We keep being introduced to families who have adopted, where adopted themselves, or even gave a child for adoption.  It's been amazing to hear everyone's different stories and be encouraged through them.  I feel like everywhere I go I'm getting a little message from God telling me He's preparing us something really special:) 

Friends

 Last weekend was a big treat.  One of my favorite people in the world came to spend the weekend with me.  Tyler went off on a guys weekend in Orlando so my friend Laura came to Palm Beach to have a girls weekend with me:)  When you're married it's a lot harder to have that much needed girl time so I was very excited!  The weekend consisted of a lot of talking, laughing, and eating and of course plenty of wine, cosmos and margaritas. 

 

Laura and I walking on the beach

Lunch at Sailfish

Laura and I met back in college when we both joined Chi Omega.  We were one of the other's maid of honors in our weddings (yes we each had 2.  It's what the cool people are doing)  I've always loved our ability to be completely honest with one another and find humor in practically everything.  She's the first person I call when I have a funny story or need advice or need someone to pray for me.  She's a life-long friend and I'm so thankful for her!  So glad I got to spend some awesome quality time with her (if you know me well you know how I love quality time.  It's totally my love language.)  You should also know that my good friend is very talented.  Check out her website and see for yourself.  www.twigzdesign.com  

 

This weekend I also got to spend some girl time celebrating birthdays.  Happy Early Birthday Siiri and Jackie!:)  Both these lovely ladies are more friends that I'm so thankful for!  I'm very glad they were born and I get to call them my friends.  In fact I'm thankful for all the ladies that went out to celebrate!  It's kinda funny how when you leave college you can't imagine making new friends as good as the ones you already have.  But God's totally blessed me with some awesome ladies in my life.  There's no way to replace the old friends and those friendships still run strong but it's awesome to grow the new ones too.  It reminds me that God is all about relationships.  He blesses us through them time and time again and He desires to have one with us.  Do I spend as much time with God as I do my friends?  Do I invest in my relationship with Him like I  do with my family?  Not nearly enough but I'm working on it.  Thankfully, He loves me despite my failures. 

I'm a terrible blogger...

Hope no one expects me to blog everyday:)  I've never been the most disciplined person so making myself write everyday might be tricky.  I actually prefer to never do the same thing everyday anyway.  I hate schedules!  I get very bored if I feel like I do anything over and over again which probably isn't good.  A very wise man once told me, "boredom is a sign of low intelligence and lack of creativity".  well crap:/ 

There is an aspect of my life that's been requiring a lot of discipline lately.  I'm running a half-marathon in March!  Eeek!  What am I thinking?!  My awesome little brother wanted to run one before he turns 25 and I offered to run with him (I couldn't let him show me up:).  I am not a runner.  It hurts and and I've never understood why you would want to run if someone wasn't chasing you.  Even then I probably wouldn't run.  I'm a stay and fight back kind of girl:)  But I have some really awesome friends in my life who have run a lot of half-marathons and even a marathon (shout out to Jackie for being an awesome marathoner!)  They've really inspired me and so has my brother.  I can't leave him hanging so if he's running this thing so am I!  I've been "training" for a few weeks now and it's amazing how much I'm actually liking it!  At first I hated it and wanted to die every time I ran.  But sloooowly by body has come around and stopped punishing me for wanting to do this.  Now it feels great and I can't wait to run again!  Maybe I am a runner after all:)  And I have to say, I'm loving the time I spend with God while I run.   When it was awful and painful I was mostly just begging for God to give me strength to finish that mile or to even make my next step.  Now that I'm feeling pretty good with it I've really loved being able to just talk with God and listen.  Sometimes I catch myself singing along to the worship songs on my ipod while I run.  I'm sure I look insane but I don't care.

On an adoption note, we had a meeting with our lawyer on Sunday.  I love that our lawyer is also our good friend!  I'm sure it looked much different than most adoption lawyer meetings.  Our friends had us over for steaks, sweet potatoes and wine while we discussed some adoption details.  Our bill for the meeting was to bring the salad and dessert:)  It was a great night with friends praying over this process and working out some of the details.  We discussed costs of the legal stuff we have to do , how we'll handle the grant money and what our future steps will be once we are matched to a birth mother.  It's crazy how many steps we have to take to bring our baby home but it helps to have good friends helping us along the way! 

Thank you!!

Thank you to everyone for all your words of encouragement!  We feel very blessed to have so many people praying for us and supporting us through this process.  Especially because some of the responses I've gotten haven't always been encouraging. I don't think people mean to be unsupportive.  I think they're just surprised that we are choosing to adopt and don't know what to say.  And that's okay.  Seriously.  I know this is something new to most people.  I really am happy to share and answer questions as best I can.  But it can be frustrating.  I can tell the difference when I tell someone we're adopting and they're genuinely excited and when they think it's weird.  There's a look in their eyes that's easily recognizable.  I try not to let it bother me but it does sting a little.  If I was telling someone I was pregnant there would be no look of hesitation and questioning.  And let me go ahead and answer the most common question:  We do not struggle with infertility and we do plan on having biological children as well.  I would like to get pregnant at least once simply because I would like to have that experience but we also plan to adopt multiple times.  I have wanted to adopt since I can remember and those of you who know me well have probably heard me talking about it for years.  There are so many children who need a home and I hope Tyler and I can provide a good one.  My prayer is that through our experience more people would consider adoption when growing their family. 

And if I could ask a favor/give some advice......if someone tells you they're adopting please do not tell them all the different horror stories you've heard or about your friend who has had failed adoptions or a bad experience.  It is not helpful:)  If I were pregnant would you run through all the people you know who have had miscarriages or how common they are?  I'd hope not!  We are not naive.  We know the risks and we know that we will probably go through at least one failed adoption before we bring our baby home (according to the books they're very common)  But we know God will bring us our baby when it's the baby He wants for us and according to His timing.  We know this can be an emotional and difficult journey.  We have control over nothing and that's terrifying!  But we are trusting God to lead us the whole way and He never disappoints. 

First Trimester.....of Adoption:)

Yep we're adopting!  A big reason I wanted to write a blog is because Tyler and I just started the adoption process and we wanted an easy way to share the experience with our friends and family.  We are very excited about starting our family but also terrified and also overwhelmed by the whole process and also worried about paying for everything.......but mostly we're excited:)  It's crazy really how many emotions I can feel about it but I assume that's how anyone feels when starting their family whether it be through adoption or not.  All I know is that I feel like I was made to be a mom and I can't wait.  Let me try and catch everyone up....

We are referring to this stage of adoption as the first trimester.  We met with our social worker back in October to set up the game plan .  Her name's Pam and she's flippin awesome.  Met her through our church when she spoke one Sunday about adopting her children.  She's also the one who actually convinced us to adopt domestically instead of internationally.  We had already picked out the orphanage in Ethiopia we wanted to adopt from when Pam asked us if we'd be willing to adopt from here.  Apparently Florida has a difficult time getting black babies adopted (I think that's crazy) and obviously we weren't expecting to get a white baby from Ethiopia.  I was hesitant because of how difficult it is to adopt domestically.  It's usually more expensive and a much longer process.  However Pam is awesome and is not only offering her services for free but got us in touch with a lawyer who is dramatically cheaper than most adoption lawyers.  He is passionate about adoption and never wants money to be a reason for a family not to adopt.  We feel extremely blessed God brought them into our lives!!  We are also applying for lots and lots and lots of grants to help pay for the needed expenses.  And because we are willing to take a non-Caucasian baby we won't have to wait as long to get matched with a birth mother.  It's been very obvious that this is the direction God is leading us.  There are definitely some draw backs to domestic adoption (the biggest being the risk of the birth mother changing her mind) but we know God is preparing a baby out there for us and we trust Him and His timing. 

Our first meeting with Pam was very informative.  She explained to us all the different kinds of adoption and the pros and cons of private adoption vs. using an agency.  We also went ahead and did the paper work for our DCF clearance.  Our homework afterwards was to do our research and decide between agency or private adoption. After a lot of prayer and research of different grants and talking with friends we decided to go with private.  We have a friend, Jeremy who is a lawyer and willing to charge even less than the lawyer Pam had recommended.  And Pam's lawyer is amazingly willing to help Jeremy through the process for no charge!  We feel very blessed to have such a wonderful, God-centered team behind us in this process!

Our next step is to start preparing for our home study and putting our profile together.  This is a very daunting project and one I'm really not looking forward to!  But I know it'll all be worth it:)  Our goal is to have everything done by the end of March and then we wait to be matched with a birth mother.  In a perfect world we could have a baby by this summer or fall.  However, adoption is rarely a perfect world.  Thankfully, God is in control and He knows what He's doing:)

Please join us in praying over this process!  Pray for mine and Tyler's hearts as we prepare to become parents and face this long road ahead of bringing our baby home.  Please lift up our baby's birth mother.  I can't even imagine how difficult this will be for her!  And pray for our child.  We know God will bring us the baby He wants for us.  And please feel free to ask us any questions you might have about adoption.  We will always be as open and honest as possible.  Thank you for sharing in this journey with us! 

Welcome to my blog!

Oh hi:)  I'm writing a blog (obviously).  I have a feeling my mom and maybe 3 other people will actually read this but that's okay:)  I wanted a chance to share about my life with Tyler, being a nanny and our newest adventure in starting a family.  Why the name "Crazy Us"?  Some would argue that we actually are crazy but that's not where the name comes from.  It's actually an inside joke.  I can't remember when it started but it feels like forever ago.  Tyler and I put the word crazy in front of every other word when we talk about pretty much everything.  Here's an example:
me: "Hey did you go to the crazy store?" 
Tyler: "yep crazy did.  I got crazy milk, crazy spaghetti sauce and crazy toilet paper" 
me: "Crazy awesome.  I crazy love you." 
Tyler: "Crazy love you too."
me: "Crazy"

Yes I am aware how weird that is.  That's why we usually keep those kind of conversations between just the two of us:)  But what it comes down to is that we crazy love each other.  We were even going to have "I crazy love you" engraved in our wedding rings but ran out of time before the wedding.  It's one of those things we keep saying we're still going to do one day...

I hope you crazy like reading about crazy us.